Be Your Own Detective
Keep a detailed record of every thing you think and do for 48 hours, what you are Honestly focusing on. This is Your record, no one else needs to see it, so be Brutally Truthful & Keenly Aware of everything to keep a highly accurate, detailed record. You could even record yourself with your phone of all your thoughts and doings. Then, after 48 hours, read and/or listen to your last 2 days of life. Where was your focus? What were your thoughts? Did your actions coincide with what you'd like to have for a life? What is renting space in your head? Where is your attention? Is it creating more joy or more suffering?